Its a love/hate relationship.

Fashion. You have probably heard that word. Sometimes uttered in disgust, sometimes in sheer delight. However, fashion sometimes is not always so simple as it seems.  I believe that it differs greatly depending on the person considering it.

Modern, Chic, Retro, Vintage, Grunge, Drab, Classic. All words that mean one thing…fashion! Fashion does not have to be all runway glitz and glamour. It can be as simple as spending those extra five minutes (Okay lets be honest, 10 minutes) to find your lucky tights, get that last strand of hair right, and clasp on a necklace. Fashion can be meant to stand out from the crowd or blend in with style.

            My sense of fashion is what most call eclectic. I will readily admit sometimes it looks amazing and sometimes it’s a major fashion fail! But hey, if you don’t try it how will you know? Some people say you cannot wear a corset anymore, but others are incorporating it more and more into their clothing. Just the other day I wore a A-line red short sleeved dress with a black silver clasped corset over top! Toss on some chic silver bling and a pair of black heals and bam, your very own fashion show. We all have those moments in our bedrooms where we try on random outfits that we would never show anyone! Don’t be afraid to experiment with your closet. (No one has to know you tried a blouse, skirt, and toe socks.)

            Long rant short, don’t be afraid of fashion! If you are into going to fashion shows and trying out every style, that is awesome. If you are into checking out peoples outfits while out and about and silently criticizing the mannequins in shop windows, that’s cool too! Both are fashion! And even if you are the most fashion conscious person in the world, we all have our “comfy clothes” that we don’t want anyone to see.  Perhaps its not quite glamorous, but not everything has to be. As long as you don’t end up on “People Of Walmart” you are fine!

Belated Thankfulness

Here I am. It is almost 2am. And I realized I did not even once think about what I am thankful for all day.
(Apologies for bad writing. Words dont form well in my head lately. I need to go back on Lyme medication)

    Lately I have been so sick that it is hard for me to remember what I am thankful for. All the good in life is sometimes hidden by pain. I guess I will just have to work harder to see through it to the good.

I am thankful that all of the pain I have gone through (and am in_ has made me more perceptive to others needs and emotions.

I am thankful "Once [I] feel the wait of glory, all [my] pain will fade to memory"

I am thankful that even though my family knows they cannot understand my dealings with Lyme disease, they still try.

I am thankful that I have a boyfriend who can stand helping me through this.

I am thankful for friends who understand when I have to cancel things because of my health.

I am thankful for my bunny rabbit Charlie, who helps me avoid my depression.

I am thankful that, even though almost every day at my work is painful and hard to get through, it is worth it. My coworkers are awesome, and it is good for me(hopefully) to be out of the house.

I am thankful for tea, and its helpfulness for both headaches and mood.

I am thankful that some people don't freak out over my sickness issues and help me laugh my way through it (Like when I was convulsing badly and when I said it happens occasionally, please don't make it a big deal and my boyfriend just pretended that I was dancing badly and started dancing badly too)

But mostly I am thankful for a God that I can rely on. Who I know will give me strength to push through if I ask it of him. Who fills me with hope and mercy at every turn, if only I open my heart to him.
 I am thankful that even when I am at my most sulky, hate every one, sarcastic moods and I do not want to ask God to help me alter my mood, I do anyway. And then all the hate and venom in my thoughts go away and allow me to be kind and helpful to others.
Even when I literally do not have the words to ask God for help, when I cant figure out how to put words into a sentence, that He knows my heart, and though he does not heal me, he gives me the strength to forge on. 


Before The Morning---Josh Wilson (Song. LISTEN!!)

Hello. My name is Rowan. I am a plant addict.

So, recently I've started working at Mahoney's Garden Center in Falmouth.
It is an amazing place, and I had wanted to work there for a few years now.

In short, I adore it. Its calm and relaxing even when we are really busy. Between the lovely flowers and the birds chirping, its like a heaven. A really busy, sweaty heaven.

(I was worried about having a job with my Lyme disease, but my Panic attacks and Anxiety attacks have not even been a problem there, which is amazing.)

However, all jobs have their little problems. This one is more of a my problem then the job.
See, the problem with working at a Garden Center, is almost every plant I see, I want.  I have literally been counting down the days till I get payed, JUST so I can then go and buy plants and seeds. 

I have a feeling that most of the money I make will be spent there. Aaand I am okay with that. 

Hello. My name is Rowan. I am a plant addict. 

You might say "Oh no, You are not an addict. You just like plants!"

Ohhhho hoo! Well you my dear, would be wrong. 

I have a whole list of seeds that I want for an herb garden. And the list is pretty much every herb that can be grown on Cape Cod. 

I also have a whole list of plants that I would like to get. (Mostly Perennials) 

Not only that, but I have been planning for a Grape Arbor. 
I also want to get Roses, Lilacs, and a Bay Laurel. 
AND THOSE ARE JUST THE OUTDOOR PLANTS!

I would say "OH SOMEONE HELP ME"

But I really dont want to be helped. I ADORE plants. 

THEN. Then I realized that I will, one day, move out of my Parent's house (Hopefully!!) and it will be hard to bring all of them with me. Some plants dont like to be transplanted. Also, Mom might not want to let them go.

SO WHAT WILL I DO THEN??? 


*Sighhhhh* I blame my dear Nana in full for my addiction to plants. She keeps the most amazing gardens that I have been enamored with since I was very little. 

Also, MaTante Rebecca loved her gardens so very much. 

Between those two amazing women, my addiction to plants has no cure.

And I can not thank them enough for that! 

Oh hey. I have to leave for work in an hour.
I guess that is the end of my post!